You wanted it?
You're getting it!
The stirring conclusion to The Big Van.
And
MUCH, MUCH MORE!!!
Let's pick up where we left off, shall we?
So, me n' Van, who are already several sheets to the wind, have about 2 more hours to kill before the show.
CRAP!
But, the show must go on. And go on, it did.
We went to a cool place nearby and settled in at the bar. Van is one of those people who likes to talk to any/all random people around us, which always makes for an interesting time. All was fine and good when we were sticking to beer. Then, Van, enticed by the mixologist bartender shaking up colorful concoctions, decided we should "try some o' them fun whiskey cocktails!"
Batter UP!
The rest is [not shockingly] a bit hazy. We headed to the venue to see a CRAZY SHOW by a half-naked fat dude screaming at me from a stage. Apparently, I wasn't as well-versed in their tunes as I thought...
After we'd had our fill of hopping [yes HOPPING] around the floor for 45 mins, whilst feverishly avoiding the "PIT," Van leaned over and gave me the signal to get the hell out.
PHEW!
During the show, he had gotten significantly more touchy with me, and we stumbled out of the venue holding hands, probably to keep each other from falling on our faces.
Wanna know what's the most BANANAS part?
I was the more sober one.
That's right. ME.
[God help us all.]
My New Yorker instincts took over and I chased us down a cab back to his house. I didn't fully realize how wastoided Van was at that juncture until we got back to his place and resumed our positions on the couch. Only this time, his leg massage got slightly more aggressive.
FINALLY!
We had a slurry conversation in which he told me he thought I was "garrgeous" and "soo beaaaufull."
So I told him "I've had a giant crush on you for EIGHT years!"
He said "ditto."
And then...I waited. And waited. And...yeah, waited.
Finally, feeling exhausted and in an expeditious mood I yelled:
"If you don't hurry up and kiss me, I'm gonna SMACK you!!"
He obliged.
AHHHHHHH!
Guess he doesn't think of me as a dude, huh?
We proceeded to walk up the death stairs to his bedroom and get cozy'd up in bed. And then?
HE. PASSED. OUT.
Awesome.
I laughed, went to wash up and spent a delightful night in the strong, spooning arms of the longest-running, unrequited crushe of my existence.
To say it felt great is a gigundo understatement!
I did have my worries about how things would be the next morning. What would he remember? Would it be totes awky?
Luckily, I'm fairly certain Van was still half-intoxicated the next morning and when he finally awoke from his coma and returned from the bathroom, he pounced into the bed, stuck his nose into my shoulder and exclaimed "You smell like delicious!"
[cue giant silent sigh of relief]
So we had a nice, cuddly morning in Vancouver and when our heads had [mostly] stopped pounding in hangover protest, we dragged our asses out of bed and went to start our day's plans, which consisted of brunch followed by him taking me on a lovely ride on his boat to this little island he's told me about several times.
Once at brunch, Van took a turn for the worse. And then continued to experience what I like to call the "Hangover Waves." It's when you're wickedly hungover and, then you feel kinda better....and, then...NOT. Repeat!
So this continued throughout the day, and I felt so bad for him. It was truly like he had lost his "sparkle." He managed to still take me out on the boat and did the best he could, but something felt like it was missing. Like the minute we left his house that morning, the "magic" was gone and we were just back to friends.
I also think he has a lot going on in his life and some strange residual stuff with his ex-gf. Who knows.
And really, does it matter?
He lives in Canada. I live in NYC. And I see none of that changing anytime soon.
But we had a blast together and, in a strange way, I feel like I can "check that box" now {ooh, so many wrong jokes you could insert here!}, and keep moving on.
It was a fun, last minute fling-y idea and I'm glad I did it.
So....NEXT?
Oh yes, my friends. I am WEEKS behind on Adventures and/or MISadventures to tell you!
Thank you for reading and encouraging me to write.
I love writing this blog and telling you all my moronical stories, so I'm so glad you like reading them!
I only wish I had more time to TELL you all of them, but never fear. They are coming. Slowly, and surely. You know, just the way you like it...
[cue single eyebrow raise]
Stay tuned! Hopefully more stories will be here soon! If anyone wants to do my advertising job so I have more time to write, please contact me anytime.
until then...I am not even spell-checking this and will have to add pics later!
Tuesday, August 30, 2011
Friday, August 12, 2011
Dating Story #63, The Big Van.
Okay, so I'm now going to stop apologizing for delay in blog writing.
'Cause, it's summer. And shite is BIZZZEEE! I'm sure it is for you too, so chances are you haven't even really missed me that much and I'm just beating myself up for no reason/Jewish guilt.
First off, I've recently been out n' aboot all over the place and every cute guy I meet is just getting YOUNGER AND YOUNGER. Seriously- last night?
Twenty-freakin-two!
Not to mention Venezuelan and MUY caliente! But still, can't go there. I feel like I may have to change this blog's name to
"LINDSEY'S ADVENTURES IN BABYSITTING"
Seriously, now.
Moving right along to story #63.
Several years ago, in the beginning of my career, my co-worker/best friend and I would get shipped off to Vancouver for these EPICALLY long Fisher-Price toy shoots. It pretty much sucked a big fat donkey ass, but what could we do? Three years in a row, we were out there for about a month at a time. It was enough for a 24 year old me to lose my shit. So, I did what I do best: Made friends.
All the guys on the crew were the same every year, not to mention hilarious and attractive. Hell, they could have been dogs and I would've befriended them! Boredom is my worst enemy.
Luckily, they weren't dogs. Especially one in particular: Van. Not only was he quite the looker, tall dark and handsome (aka my type) with blue eyes, he was something that makes a guy even hotter for me: HILARIOUS.
Instead of dreading a long, grueling day on a set trying to make some pathetic Canadian toddler play with some dysfunctional toy for a horrid commercial, I would look forward to it. Bizarre how someone with a like-minded wacky sense of humor can change something for you.
And, I'd like to think maybe I made his day a little too.
But alas, I had a BOYFRIEND all of those years [who I later married. And, divorced.] But I behaved and we were just friends.
Friends who kept in touch- like ACTUAL phone calls, when people made those.
And of course iChatting and text and eventually Facebook when that emerged. Through all those years we stayed friends, through my marriage, divorce, his girlfriend, etc.
A few months back we were catching up over some form of internet chat and I must've asked if he was still with his gf. He replied "nah, she moved."
Interesting.
He's always wanted to come to NYC and I told him again he was welcome now that he was a free man.
Yeah, sure, maybe, future, blah, blah kind of convo. Didn't think much more about it, until a few weeks ago when I found out I had to go to Portland for business and my trip was butting right up to a weekend. Hmm...
-West coast
-Summertime
-Van has a boat [sends me pics frequently from said boat]
-Good friend Tata in Vancouver for a shoot for a month, so...friend to see, place to stay (if I needed it).
Yes, my friends. The wheels were a' spinning!
'Cause, it's summer. And shite is BIZZZEEE! I'm sure it is for you too, so chances are you haven't even really missed me that much and I'm just beating myself up for no reason/Jewish guilt.
First off, I've recently been out n' aboot all over the place and every cute guy I meet is just getting YOUNGER AND YOUNGER. Seriously- last night?
Twenty-freakin-two!
Not to mention Venezuelan and MUY caliente! But still, can't go there. I feel like I may have to change this blog's name to
"LINDSEY'S ADVENTURES IN BABYSITTING"
Seriously, now.
Moving right along to story #63.
Several years ago, in the beginning of my career, my co-worker/best friend and I would get shipped off to Vancouver for these EPICALLY long Fisher-Price toy shoots. It pretty much sucked a big fat donkey ass, but what could we do? Three years in a row, we were out there for about a month at a time. It was enough for a 24 year old me to lose my shit. So, I did what I do best: Made friends.
All the guys on the crew were the same every year, not to mention hilarious and attractive. Hell, they could have been dogs and I would've befriended them! Boredom is my worst enemy.
Luckily, they weren't dogs. Especially one in particular: Van. Not only was he quite the looker, tall dark and handsome (aka my type) with blue eyes, he was something that makes a guy even hotter for me: HILARIOUS.
Instead of dreading a long, grueling day on a set trying to make some pathetic Canadian toddler play with some dysfunctional toy for a horrid commercial, I would look forward to it. Bizarre how someone with a like-minded wacky sense of humor can change something for you.
And, I'd like to think maybe I made his day a little too.
But alas, I had a BOYFRIEND all of those years [who I later married. And, divorced.] But I behaved and we were just friends.
Friends who kept in touch- like ACTUAL phone calls, when people made those.
And of course iChatting and text and eventually Facebook when that emerged. Through all those years we stayed friends, through my marriage, divorce, his girlfriend, etc.
A few months back we were catching up over some form of internet chat and I must've asked if he was still with his gf. He replied "nah, she moved."
Interesting.
He's always wanted to come to NYC and I told him again he was welcome now that he was a free man.
Yeah, sure, maybe, future, blah, blah kind of convo. Didn't think much more about it, until a few weeks ago when I found out I had to go to Portland for business and my trip was butting right up to a weekend. Hmm...
-West coast
-Summertime
-Van has a boat [sends me pics frequently from said boat]
-Good friend Tata in Vancouver for a shoot for a month, so...friend to see, place to stay (if I needed it).
Yes, my friends. The wheels were a' spinning!
So I hit Van up to see if he'd be around and able to hang with me. He was! However due to some FB confusion, I got nervous that he may have gotten back together with his gf so I felt the need to double-check on this. Not that I wouldn't have wanted to see him even if he was attached, but let's get real here. This isn't called "Lindsey's MISadventures in Friendship," now is it? Right.
But how to ask this question without seeming insane? A-ha!
ME: "Also, will your gf be annoyed if you spend time showing me around?"
HIM: "I am sans gf. In other words, no one's the boss of me."
Oh yeah.
It's on like a backwards thong!
Pulled the trigger, bought the tickets, done and done. Why the hell not, right?
One day I will hopefully look back and think "I'm glad I did whatever the hell I wanted to when I had absolutely nothing tying me down." Let's just hope I survive to see that day.
In Portland, my colleagues and I had a lovely hour-long discussion about advertising (initiated by yours truly) with Jack McBrayer, aka Kenneth from "30 Rock" at the weird hotel bar. How random is that? AMAZINGLY nice guy, btw. Exactly as you'd expect him to be.
That was pretty much the highlight of my biz trip, and as it was wrapping up, I actually started to get a bit nervous about seeing Van. I mean, it don't think I've been back since '04, and we've never been single at the same time. Plus, what if he doesn't even like me like that? What if he just thinks of me like a "dude?"
AHHH!
Am I really in my 30's and having this kind of internal dialogue with myself?
[Apparently.]
But Van offered to pick me up at the airport, so that was a good first sign. Plus I knew no matter what, I'd have a good time with him. Impossible not to.
He showed up at the airport and looked just as handsome as I remembered, only with just a few gray hairs beginning to show. Funny, I remember thinking that 11 years older than me was, like, a LOT when I first met him. Now, it seems like nothing.
He suggested we go immediately to a nearby bar on the water called "The Flying Beaver" to have the famous Canadian drink he introduced me to years ago called a Bloody Caesar. It's kind of like a Bloody Mary, only WAY awesomer.
As we drove over there, he made a wrong turn and got kind of perturbed with himself for it. I told him it really wasn't a big deal and not to beat himself up. After several cocktails in, he revealed to me that he knew EXACTLY where he was going, he just got distracted by my LEGS.
HAHAHAHA!!!!!
That may be one of the best compliments my legs have ever received.
After several lackluster Flying Beaver Caesars, we set off for better Caesars and, my favorite, oysters.
If you've never been to Vancouver, you should know the seafood is so fresh it practically swims up to the table and flops onto your plate. INSANITY. The oysters are so good I had to be careful not to O.D. on them like I did several years ago. Not pretty.
Also, before the trip, I had a talk with myself that went something like this:
"Self, please do not drink too much too fast so that you drink yourself right out of the equation, like times in the past."
And, I really did somehow maintain my wits, despite a marathon of day-drinking! Mostly because I stuck to beer, but STILL. Props to me.
While we were catching up, talking about music since we're both obsessed, he said "Hey! We should try to catch a show while you're here!" So we looked and found that Les Savy Fav was playing that night and we'd both been wanting to see them. Since tickets were no longer avail online, we called and the venue told us to just come by at 8:30p and buy tix there. Done and done!
Since the venue was close to his home and it was already late afternoon, we headed over to that area. Mind you, I still had NO idea where I would be residing for the night! He had never said "Oh, you should stay with me." And I don't ever assume anything when it comes to guys. EVER. So I just rolled with it. And as we rolled up to his house, he told me to bring my bags in because there's a lot of theft in Vancouver, apparently. So, I obliged. And, asked no questions. At that point, I'd had roughly 7 beers and 2 Bloody Caesars and figured I'd probably end up where my stuff was. Which, was exactly what I wanted. [Check.]
We sat on the couch for awhile and I removed my boots to find horrible ugly sock lines on my legs! I couldn't hide my dismay of that hideous site on my only sexy lady feature! So, when Van saw my unrest, he had me sit on the couch and he gave me an incredible leg massage.
HELL-O!
So...yeah. Maybe it's on?
He successfully got my legs back to working order, just in time for me to put my boots back on. Road sodas in hand [ie beers-on--the-go], we got in a cab and headed to buy tickets at the venue in Gastown, or as I like to call it, "Junkieville!"
Okay, so the junkies hang out a block away from the swanky coolness of Gastown, but still. There's some incredible "theater" happening over there!
So, we get to the venue to buy the tickets at 8:30p. And....they inform us the band will be on at 11:30p!
Oh.
So, we've been drinking ALL day.
Are stuck in Gastown due to previously-stated drinking all day.
And now have THREE hours to kill before the show.
No bigz.
TO THE BARS!
[Silent prayer: Hey, God. It's me, Lindsey. Please allow me to not get black-out drunk tonight and ruin things. I mean, besides my liver. A-men!]
Want more story? Stay tuned....
And, I really did somehow maintain my wits, despite a marathon of day-drinking! Mostly because I stuck to beer, but STILL. Props to me.
While we were catching up, talking about music since we're both obsessed, he said "Hey! We should try to catch a show while you're here!" So we looked and found that Les Savy Fav was playing that night and we'd both been wanting to see them. Since tickets were no longer avail online, we called and the venue told us to just come by at 8:30p and buy tix there. Done and done!
Since the venue was close to his home and it was already late afternoon, we headed over to that area. Mind you, I still had NO idea where I would be residing for the night! He had never said "Oh, you should stay with me." And I don't ever assume anything when it comes to guys. EVER. So I just rolled with it. And as we rolled up to his house, he told me to bring my bags in because there's a lot of theft in Vancouver, apparently. So, I obliged. And, asked no questions. At that point, I'd had roughly 7 beers and 2 Bloody Caesars and figured I'd probably end up where my stuff was. Which, was exactly what I wanted. [Check.]
We sat on the couch for awhile and I removed my boots to find horrible ugly sock lines on my legs! I couldn't hide my dismay of that hideous site on my only sexy lady feature! So, when Van saw my unrest, he had me sit on the couch and he gave me an incredible leg massage.
HELL-O!
So...yeah. Maybe it's on?
He successfully got my legs back to working order, just in time for me to put my boots back on. Road sodas in hand [ie beers-on--the-go], we got in a cab and headed to buy tickets at the venue in Gastown, or as I like to call it, "Junkieville!"
Okay, so the junkies hang out a block away from the swanky coolness of Gastown, but still. There's some incredible "theater" happening over there!
So, we get to the venue to buy the tickets at 8:30p. And....they inform us the band will be on at 11:30p!
Oh.
So, we've been drinking ALL day.
Are stuck in Gastown due to previously-stated drinking all day.
And now have THREE hours to kill before the show.
No bigz.
TO THE BARS!
[Silent prayer: Hey, God. It's me, Lindsey. Please allow me to not get black-out drunk tonight and ruin things. I mean, besides my liver. A-men!]
Want more story? Stay tuned....
Friday, July 29, 2011
Dating stories #60-63, Back on the block and ready to rock, y'all!
Holy cannoli, do you people HATE me by now? 'Cause I kinda hate myself!
I had to pee 3 times while writing this. Just giving you a head's up. {y'welcome!}
Ready...set...READ!
#60- Irish
Irish was only in town for 2 weeks but I managed to see him 3 times! Maybe one of the nicest, most genuine (not to mention RIPPED) guys I think I've ever met. Doesn't drink [just because he doesn't like it, not because he's an alkie] and is just high on life. So fun, positive, upbeat. Figures he'd live halfway across the planet. But he claims to want to move to NYC. Not that I'd really see that going anywhere, but we've kept in touch every since and he loves to sent me "HeyTell" messages on my iPhone, which is awesome because I get to hear his adorable Irish brogue on the regs.
Last night I got one that started with "Where's me gal?" Ahh. So so cute.
#61- Beans&Cheese
2 weeks ago, the lovely MIM [and Stella the wondernugget!] joined me out in Kismet, Fire Island (aka my happy place) for the weekend. We've had a history of megasuperfuness out there and this weekend was certainly not lacking in that. The night before MIM came out, I met a guy at the [one] local bar who was kind of a dead ringer for Adrian Grenier, aka Vinny Chase on Entourage. So when I told MIM about him the next day, she thought I was saying "Beans&Cheese," therefore that is now his name. Beans&Cheese and I had a fun time the night before and bonded over a love of music. His dad is part owner of a house on Kismet and he's been coming out for 15 years, but recently moved to LA so he was just back for a visit. Nothing happened on Saturday night, and I honestly couldn't tell if he even "liked me" liked me, or just thought I was cool. Plus he was hanging around with a really young 20's crew who I could only tolerate for a limited time, coupled with the fact I heard a rumor tacos were being sold somewhere down the street. So, I bolted.
He was on the beach playing volleyball the next day and I pointed him out to MIM, who took issues with his head & chest hair. But neither bothered me.
After volleyball, he came to chat and asked me to play Kadema (paddleball), so we did that for awhile and the flirting began.
When he found out we were staying over Sunday night, we all made a plan to hang out, mostly because we wanted to see the sunset from his AMAZENUTZ balcony, aptly named "Blue View Terrace."
We exchanged numbers and the flirting continued. It seemed to be pretty ON to me!
He came over to make tacos with us and, over the course of the night, somehow became convinced that he, MIM and I were going to have a lovely little menage. This is hilarious because:
A) MIM=mormon. Right.
B) MIM= has boyfriend.
C) MIM & Me= best friends. [=gross!]
MIM took a shower later and he decided that would be a good time for us to make out. He also informed me that the whole "3-way" thing was just purely for his own amusement, since he loved the rise he was getting out of MIM. Full disclosure-- I had been drinking for several hours and was somewhat incapable of sorting this all out. So I decided to shower and then go to bed. And B&C decided to have a bunk-bed slumber party with me. Sexy, no? Apparently this very much upset Stella who must've convinced her little Maltese self that I was being attacked by a man since she likes to keep all her girls in one place/bed. The next morning, she was sooo happy to see that I survived.
We left the beach the next day but B&C and I continued to text a little bit back and forth through the earlier part of the week. I knew he was also going to be out the following weekend and I was hoping to keep in touch, enjoying the prospect of some summer lovin' waiting for me in Kismet, should I desire it.
I arrived out in Kismet the following weekend with a new crew of housemates and, a rather rowdy one at that. Funsies! I was having a grand ol' time with them, but still keeping my eye open for B&C. I discovered him on the beach that day playing volleyball. He gave me a wave as I got to the beach but that was pretty much it. I was talking to a fellow volleyball player/friend of mine so he said hi, but I was wondering if he was worried I had any expectations, so I played it pretty cool. I didn't end up seeing him on Saturday night, but had so much fun with my friends I really didn't care. Not to mention the 20 min convo I had with Roger Sterling at the Kismet Inn, totally wasted. WIN!
Sunday was an epically gorgeous day on the beach and I just did not want to leave. Not to mention, I knew leaving meant getting back to the city, packing for my week long trip to Portland and Vancouver and getting on a 6am flight the next morning. So when B&C asked me to play paddleball, I gladly obliged. But I figured I should pack it in awhile after that, so I left the beach to make some food and eventually head back. I said goodbye to him as I was leaving, knowing he'd be heading back to LA and I wouldn't see him again. He was with a posse of dudes so I basically got a high-five as I said goodbye. Awesome. About 5 mins after I got back to the beach house I got a text from him:
B&C: Hey are you leaving today? [had already told him I was. Non-listening idiots. All of them.]
Me: Yes, but not for a bit. About to grill some hot dogs. Want some?
B&C: Yes I'd love 1 or 2! Watching World Cup Soccer Over here- wanna join?
{Sure! who the hell needs to pack and/or be a responsible adult?? Besides, there's still plenty of ferries to take!}
Me: Yeah, ok. I hope you're not just asking b/c you want your food delivered.
B&C: I do, but I want you delivered too.
Oookaaay. And I'm off! I arrived at their awesome house, hot dogs in hand and had a great time watching the game with B&C and his bro, who I hadn't met yet. B&C was totally bragging on me, telling bro about my VO stuff and all the weird/funny vocabulary I had. Whaat?
It's like this quasi-ADD guy became suddenly awesome when he could focus on just me without distractions. This confirms my friend's theory of men's inability to multitask. And how!
After soccer, we adjourned to the gorgeous rooftop, had a drink and just talked a bit while the sun began to sink. Since their house is also ALWAYS full of random people, he decided we should take a walk back to my house since it was empty. Um...ok! We got back there and I was curious of his motives. Unbelievably, he just wanted to sip some beer, cuddle with me on the couch and talk. Advertising, music-- mostly music, since we realized we have that in common. I informed him I was leaving on the 7:50p ferry. He informed me "No way." Somehow, B&C convinced me to take the LAST ferry off the island at 9:35p. I got home at midnight. Began packing for my west coast trek, went to bed at 4a, got up at 5a and left for the airport.
Seriously.
Who. Am. I?
As I walked through the airport at 5:45am, I thought to myself, "Guess I'll sleep when I'm dead. Which, at this rate, could really be any day now."
Regrets? None.
This is what summer is all about, right?
And, B&C and I have continued to text ever since, and shared tons of music back and forth. Looks like I have a new buddy!
#62- 6'4
So, 6'4 (also known to close friends as "SomeE" for the hilarious Some-ecard he sent me after our first date-- about 1.5 mos ago) is, shockingly, still in the picture.
Kinda.
Sorta.
Texting.
G-chatting.
And, quite frequently at that. Awhile ago, I had talked to my fab and wise friend, Sexy Sue about having a little convo with 6'4 to the tune of "You're a business man. So I'm going to approach you that way. This needs to go somewhere or else I'm going away." Sexy Sue put the kabosh on that one! And, she was right to. No guy wants an ultimatum (before he really deserves it anyway). And what was the harm of just having entertaining virtual chat anyway? At the point, I felt kind of removed from anything happening anyway so I figured let's just see what happens. It's like an experiment.
So, what's happened?
Well, 6'4 seems to be coming more attached to me. Or, at least virtual me.
I never initiate conversation, it's always him. And he started to talk more and more about getting together, but not in "real" terms. Until he finally did. He was texting me from a biz trip in LA and said he wanted to get together upon his return. He said he could do Friday or Monday. Since I was leaving for Portland on Monday, I agreed to Friday.
Of course, Friday rolled around and....yep. Never heard from him. Sure, I could've checked in. But- screw that. I'm not doing that anymore. You wanna hang out, you make the plans and get in touch, boys.
And honestly, if ANYTHING good could have come from my hurt feelings with Boulder Boy, it's the fact that I no longer get excited too soon. I've set the bar very low and this is really working for me. So...thanks? Boulder Boy? [no, not really].
Anyway,my fab BFWB cheered me up, told me to get gussied up so I put on my fave heels and we went out to eat and, naturally, do flaming absinthe shots. Perfection!
Even better? While waiting in the bathroom line, I ended up sampling a huge bday party table's food and a cute guy passed me a note in the resto:
He looked super cute but when he passed by our table to say hi and tell us to meet them at the party, BFWB and I both confirmed the same thing: Too Short.
Wah.
I had already made the mistake of giving him my # and he's been texting me relentlessly ever since. Whoops!
So I had a good night and felt I had definitely not heard the last of 6'4, but he was no longer on my mind and, as you've already read, I had an awesome weekend in Fire Island to further take the edge off of possibly being stood up.
Monday, I was working on my computer in Portland when, of course, BING! Up pops 6'4 in my gchat. Business as usual.
I decided my tactic would be to see if he got confused which day I had picked for our date and wait to see if he made reference to us going out that nice, it being Monday and all. I chatted back and forth with him for a few mins and suddenly he said: "You're acting...different."
Wow.
I must say, I was tres impressed that he could detect that from my simple chat with him. I didn't think I was acting that differently, but still. He picked up on the nuance. So I said "You're right. I am."
He said: "Go ahead, get it off your chest."
ME: Ok. How bout I start with "How was your Friday night, 6'4?"
HIM: "It was boring. Uneventful. I unpacked, organized, cleaned my apt.
How was yours?"
ME: Well, I thought I had plans with a tall (roughly 6'4) entrepreneurial type of guy....
HIM: "HOLY SHIT! WE HAD PLANS???"
ME: "Awesome."
HIM: "NO! Oh no. I'm so sorry. Am I in deep shit?"
ME: I don't know...
HIM: "Lindsey, I really am so sorry. I guess I forgot to put it in my calendar, where I keep my LIFE and the LA biz trip was total chaos...Please, can I make it up to you?"
ME: "I'm listening."
HIM: "Let me take you out this week."
ME: "Sorry, out of town until next monday."
HIM: "Jesus!"
ME: "I guess good things will have to come to those who wait."
Sidebar: how hilarious is it that this guy who has basically not made plans with me since our first date over a month ago is now upset because I'm gone for a week?
So, I got back this week, expecting him to ask me out, although knowing I actually had ZERO open nights for him. Finally Wednesday he asked. Wednesday- really? I informed him I had no nights until Sunday. Again, he was not happy with this response/amount of wait time. {HILARZ!}
He said he'd get back to me about Sunday [probably has to check with his gf or something].
So yesterday, he popped up with a text:
HIM: Are you free to meet up for lunch today?
[cue Lindsey eyebrow raise]
ME: Ha. Does this mean you can't do Sunday?
HIM: No it just means I want to impulsively eat lunch with you right now.
ME: Love to, but alas, I have lunch plans.
HIM: Well. This is disappointing. Coffee later near your offices?
ME: Yeah, I can do that.
[WHAT!]
Is this getting as confusing and random for y'all as it is for moi?
Let me break it down for you:
-Amazing 9 hour first date about 1.5 mos ago
-Text comm ever since
-Desire for more dates not totally apparent until recently
-Will settle for even a 30 min coffee date???
Well, at least this confirmed that he actually wants to see + TALK to me, instead of ripping my clothes off [as I had pondered before as his only motive].
So, we had a lovely little coffee date.
He is just as RIDIC HOT if not even handsomer than I remembered.
And, now...?
I still have no idea if I am seeing him Sunday.
He's made references to being able to hang out longer/at nighttime/have drinks, yet no confirmation.
And today, another one to seeing me in person. I replied something to the effect of "sure. When?"
I'll get back to you guys. Or, I won't and I'll just talk and talk and talk about it.
'Cause, that's almost just as much fun, RIGHT????
#63- Van
I'm out of time! Story to come! And, it's a good'n.
Stop whining. You know you like a little tease...
xoxo
I had to pee 3 times while writing this. Just giving you a head's up. {y'welcome!}
Ready...set...READ!
#60- Irish
Irish was only in town for 2 weeks but I managed to see him 3 times! Maybe one of the nicest, most genuine (not to mention RIPPED) guys I think I've ever met. Doesn't drink [just because he doesn't like it, not because he's an alkie] and is just high on life. So fun, positive, upbeat. Figures he'd live halfway across the planet. But he claims to want to move to NYC. Not that I'd really see that going anywhere, but we've kept in touch every since and he loves to sent me "HeyTell" messages on my iPhone, which is awesome because I get to hear his adorable Irish brogue on the regs.
Last night I got one that started with "Where's me gal?" Ahh. So so cute.
#61- Beans&Cheese
2 weeks ago, the lovely MIM [and Stella the wondernugget!] joined me out in Kismet, Fire Island (aka my happy place) for the weekend. We've had a history of megasuperfuness out there and this weekend was certainly not lacking in that. The night before MIM came out, I met a guy at the [one] local bar who was kind of a dead ringer for Adrian Grenier, aka Vinny Chase on Entourage. So when I told MIM about him the next day, she thought I was saying "Beans&Cheese," therefore that is now his name. Beans&Cheese and I had a fun time the night before and bonded over a love of music. His dad is part owner of a house on Kismet and he's been coming out for 15 years, but recently moved to LA so he was just back for a visit. Nothing happened on Saturday night, and I honestly couldn't tell if he even "liked me" liked me, or just thought I was cool. Plus he was hanging around with a really young 20's crew who I could only tolerate for a limited time, coupled with the fact I heard a rumor tacos were being sold somewhere down the street. So, I bolted.
He was on the beach playing volleyball the next day and I pointed him out to MIM, who took issues with his head & chest hair. But neither bothered me.
After volleyball, he came to chat and asked me to play Kadema (paddleball), so we did that for awhile and the flirting began.
We exchanged numbers and the flirting continued. It seemed to be pretty ON to me!
He came over to make tacos with us and, over the course of the night, somehow became convinced that he, MIM and I were going to have a lovely little menage. This is hilarious because:
A) MIM=mormon. Right.
B) MIM= has boyfriend.
C) MIM & Me= best friends. [=gross!]
We left the beach the next day but B&C and I continued to text a little bit back and forth through the earlier part of the week. I knew he was also going to be out the following weekend and I was hoping to keep in touch, enjoying the prospect of some summer lovin' waiting for me in Kismet, should I desire it.
I arrived out in Kismet the following weekend with a new crew of housemates and, a rather rowdy one at that. Funsies! I was having a grand ol' time with them, but still keeping my eye open for B&C. I discovered him on the beach that day playing volleyball. He gave me a wave as I got to the beach but that was pretty much it. I was talking to a fellow volleyball player/friend of mine so he said hi, but I was wondering if he was worried I had any expectations, so I played it pretty cool. I didn't end up seeing him on Saturday night, but had so much fun with my friends I really didn't care. Not to mention the 20 min convo I had with Roger Sterling at the Kismet Inn, totally wasted. WIN!
Sunday was an epically gorgeous day on the beach and I just did not want to leave. Not to mention, I knew leaving meant getting back to the city, packing for my week long trip to Portland and Vancouver and getting on a 6am flight the next morning. So when B&C asked me to play paddleball, I gladly obliged. But I figured I should pack it in awhile after that, so I left the beach to make some food and eventually head back. I said goodbye to him as I was leaving, knowing he'd be heading back to LA and I wouldn't see him again. He was with a posse of dudes so I basically got a high-five as I said goodbye. Awesome. About 5 mins after I got back to the beach house I got a text from him:
B&C: Hey are you leaving today? [had already told him I was. Non-listening idiots. All of them.]
Me: Yes, but not for a bit. About to grill some hot dogs. Want some?
B&C: Yes I'd love 1 or 2! Watching World Cup Soccer Over here- wanna join?
{Sure! who the hell needs to pack and/or be a responsible adult?? Besides, there's still plenty of ferries to take!}
Me: Yeah, ok. I hope you're not just asking b/c you want your food delivered.
B&C: I do, but I want you delivered too.
Oookaaay. And I'm off! I arrived at their awesome house, hot dogs in hand and had a great time watching the game with B&C and his bro, who I hadn't met yet. B&C was totally bragging on me, telling bro about my VO stuff and all the weird/funny vocabulary I had. Whaat?
It's like this quasi-ADD guy became suddenly awesome when he could focus on just me without distractions. This confirms my friend's theory of men's inability to multitask. And how!
Seriously.
Who. Am. I?
Regrets? None.
This is what summer is all about, right?
And, B&C and I have continued to text ever since, and shared tons of music back and forth. Looks like I have a new buddy!
#62- 6'4
So, 6'4 (also known to close friends as "SomeE" for the hilarious Some-ecard he sent me after our first date-- about 1.5 mos ago) is, shockingly, still in the picture.
Kinda.
Sorta.
Texting.
G-chatting.
And, quite frequently at that. Awhile ago, I had talked to my fab and wise friend, Sexy Sue about having a little convo with 6'4 to the tune of "You're a business man. So I'm going to approach you that way. This needs to go somewhere or else I'm going away." Sexy Sue put the kabosh on that one! And, she was right to. No guy wants an ultimatum (before he really deserves it anyway). And what was the harm of just having entertaining virtual chat anyway? At the point, I felt kind of removed from anything happening anyway so I figured let's just see what happens. It's like an experiment.
So, what's happened?
Well, 6'4 seems to be coming more attached to me. Or, at least virtual me.
I never initiate conversation, it's always him. And he started to talk more and more about getting together, but not in "real" terms. Until he finally did. He was texting me from a biz trip in LA and said he wanted to get together upon his return. He said he could do Friday or Monday. Since I was leaving for Portland on Monday, I agreed to Friday.
Of course, Friday rolled around and....yep. Never heard from him. Sure, I could've checked in. But- screw that. I'm not doing that anymore. You wanna hang out, you make the plans and get in touch, boys.
And honestly, if ANYTHING good could have come from my hurt feelings with Boulder Boy, it's the fact that I no longer get excited too soon. I've set the bar very low and this is really working for me. So...thanks? Boulder Boy? [no, not really].
Anyway,my fab BFWB cheered me up, told me to get gussied up so I put on my fave heels and we went out to eat and, naturally, do flaming absinthe shots. Perfection!Even better? While waiting in the bathroom line, I ended up sampling a huge bday party table's food and a cute guy passed me a note in the resto:
He looked super cute but when he passed by our table to say hi and tell us to meet them at the party, BFWB and I both confirmed the same thing: Too Short.
Wah.
I had already made the mistake of giving him my # and he's been texting me relentlessly ever since. Whoops!
So I had a good night and felt I had definitely not heard the last of 6'4, but he was no longer on my mind and, as you've already read, I had an awesome weekend in Fire Island to further take the edge off of possibly being stood up.
Monday, I was working on my computer in Portland when, of course, BING! Up pops 6'4 in my gchat. Business as usual.
I decided my tactic would be to see if he got confused which day I had picked for our date and wait to see if he made reference to us going out that nice, it being Monday and all. I chatted back and forth with him for a few mins and suddenly he said: "You're acting...different."
Wow.
I must say, I was tres impressed that he could detect that from my simple chat with him. I didn't think I was acting that differently, but still. He picked up on the nuance. So I said "You're right. I am."
He said: "Go ahead, get it off your chest."
ME: Ok. How bout I start with "How was your Friday night, 6'4?"
HIM: "It was boring. Uneventful. I unpacked, organized, cleaned my apt.
How was yours?"
ME: Well, I thought I had plans with a tall (roughly 6'4) entrepreneurial type of guy....
HIM: "HOLY SHIT! WE HAD PLANS???"
ME: "Awesome."
HIM: "NO! Oh no. I'm so sorry. Am I in deep shit?"
ME: I don't know...
HIM: "Lindsey, I really am so sorry. I guess I forgot to put it in my calendar, where I keep my LIFE and the LA biz trip was total chaos...Please, can I make it up to you?"
ME: "I'm listening."
HIM: "Let me take you out this week."
ME: "Sorry, out of town until next monday."
HIM: "Jesus!"
ME: "I guess good things will have to come to those who wait."
Sidebar: how hilarious is it that this guy who has basically not made plans with me since our first date over a month ago is now upset because I'm gone for a week?
So, I got back this week, expecting him to ask me out, although knowing I actually had ZERO open nights for him. Finally Wednesday he asked. Wednesday- really? I informed him I had no nights until Sunday. Again, he was not happy with this response/amount of wait time. {HILARZ!}
He said he'd get back to me about Sunday [probably has to check with his gf or something].
So yesterday, he popped up with a text:
HIM: Are you free to meet up for lunch today?
[cue Lindsey eyebrow raise]
ME: Ha. Does this mean you can't do Sunday?
HIM: No it just means I want to impulsively eat lunch with you right now.
ME: Love to, but alas, I have lunch plans.
HIM: Well. This is disappointing. Coffee later near your offices?
ME: Yeah, I can do that.
[WHAT!]
Is this getting as confusing and random for y'all as it is for moi?
Let me break it down for you:
-Amazing 9 hour first date about 1.5 mos ago
-Text comm ever since
-Desire for more dates not totally apparent until recently
-Will settle for even a 30 min coffee date???
Well, at least this confirmed that he actually wants to see + TALK to me, instead of ripping my clothes off [as I had pondered before as his only motive].
So, we had a lovely little coffee date.
He is just as RIDIC HOT if not even handsomer than I remembered.
And, now...?
I still have no idea if I am seeing him Sunday.
He's made references to being able to hang out longer/at nighttime/have drinks, yet no confirmation.
And today, another one to seeing me in person. I replied something to the effect of "sure. When?"
I'll get back to you guys. Or, I won't and I'll just talk and talk and talk about it.
'Cause, that's almost just as much fun, RIGHT????
#63- Van
I'm out of time! Story to come! And, it's a good'n.
Stop whining. You know you like a little tease...
xoxo
Tuesday, July 19, 2011
I swear I'm ALIVE!
Helloooo Blogland!
Did you give up on me yet? I freakin' hope not!
I have, like, one SCHMILLION stories for you. And, zero amounts of time.
BullS#%T, right??
I know.
And now, I'm in the Land o' Port (Portland) on a biz trip. But I'm hoping to have one long-ass boring day of sitting around a set all day, in which case you will get some more juicy stories. So, can you sit tight for another day or two?
Hey, it is SUMMER after all!
Seriously. Stay tuned. It'll be worth it, I promise.*
*I hope. No promises really.
Mucho Smoocho for now!
xo
Did you give up on me yet? I freakin' hope not!
I have, like, one SCHMILLION stories for you. And, zero amounts of time.
BullS#%T, right??
I know.
And now, I'm in the Land o' Port (Portland) on a biz trip. But I'm hoping to have one long-ass boring day of sitting around a set all day, in which case you will get some more juicy stories. So, can you sit tight for another day or two?
Hey, it is SUMMER after all!
Seriously. Stay tuned. It'll be worth it, I promise.*
*I hope. No promises really.
Mucho Smoocho for now!
xo
Friday, July 8, 2011
Dating story #58 & 59, The Ireland to Canada Express.
Look at me, posting TWICE in one week!
I'm back on the block and ready to rock, y'all!
As much fun as I had putting the ASS back in ASSpen with my fam, I will admit I'm having a bit of a difficult time accepting my new role as "Family 5th wheel." In a way, it's totally justice for my sister, BH, for all the years she had to deal with it. It's really not a day at the disco.
I mean, no one really "leaves me out" per se, but still. My parents want to do one thing, BH and her bf want to do another, I don't want to do either and--boom. There I am, alone. Now, as you know I am pretty fiercely independent, but still. When you're away on vacay in a beautiful spot, those are the times that make you truly reflect on how you wish you had someone to share it with. Or at least share your ridiculously huge, plush, would-never-fit-in-NYC King sized bed. Sheesh!
So, I hopped on a super early flight and got myself back to "civilization" fast. I love my family and we have a blast together, but sometimes I just need to get back to my own life to feel better. Weird.
I then agreed to meet out J-Socks and Mel, who you may remember from "Crazy Brit Guy Piggy Back Ride" night out. These are my two newly single, formerly married friends who are basically in the place I was about a year ago when I was single for the first time in a decade. I can practically hear them screaming "FREEEDOM AT LAAAAST!" with every drink we have. It's awesome.
Although re-uniting the two of them (we all used to work together) was like reuniting gasoline and dynamite. They can often make ME look tame. Yes, that's hard to do. But, impressive nonetheless.
So we had another of our "Wild Wednesdays."
At the onset, this one gave the facade of being a more tame one than the previous nights of boy-filled debauchery.
I met up with Mel at Kingswood which was fairly chill. Mel had been told that it was filled with "hot, aussie men" and was gravely disappointed when that appeared to be a strong false. Alas, I assured her it was just early-- Yes, remarkably 8:30p in NYC on a Wednesday is early. Sure enough, by the time J-Socks rolled in about 40 mins later, so did more boys. However, due to my position at the bar, we had been engaging in conversation with a tall, blonde cutie who was waiting for his friends. The best part about hanging out with J & M is that we all have VERY different types:
Mine: Tall, dark and often hipster.
Mel: Blondies, preferably tall
J-Socks: Swarthy, ranging from Latino to Eurotrash.
Since I happened to be sitting next to a Mel-type, J and I did a whole bar switcharoo while she was in the bathroom so she'd have to come back and sit next to Blondie, which worked quite well. I have no idea if the boys even noticed, not that they seemed to mind. Blondie had friends with him and they kept us continuously in cocktails.
I had also had the genius idea that night that, in effort to drink less calorically, I should only drink vodka sodas. That's fine if you're only going to have a 3-4 drink night. I'm pretty sure I was at drink 5 before we even left Kingswood. Brilliant plan, Lindsey!
Unfortunately, Blondie was the only looker of his crew and we were all cocktail'd up and ready to start our night. So, we bid them adieu to hit our good ol' standby, the Standard Biergarten, or as I have recently re-named it, MeatGarten.
It might be the ultimate pick-up scene and we have, historically, done very well there. Characters such as Muscle Brit and Jewish Lawyer (I may not have blogged about him due to dullness) have been spawned from said location. But this night at the Standard was a little off. First, J-socks got into an argument with a dorky dad about how it's totally fine to put her daughter into pageants if her daughter wants to do it. While amusing, not really beneficial to my dating life. So we wandered to another side of the expansive bar where I began talking to a very VERY tall and good-looking guy who happens to be a Canadian import. I have no idea how long we spoke since my number of cocktails had obviously been gradually increasing, but I do know he kept hugging me, got my number and then turned and kind of blew me off? Weird, but whatever. We had already decided to make a move to another favorite location, gastropub Wilfie & Nell's in the West Village.
Jackpot.
I don't know why I was dragging behind, but all I recall is walking in to J & M already seated at a table with two pretty hot guys, one who happened to be Irish.
Since it seemed like they were all set up, I went to the bar [home of my credit card that I seem to have left there and still haven't been back to retrieve] to get a drink. That's when I noticed Blondie at the bar! I think we had been texting them our locations, but he seemed to act like it was a random run-in. Regardless, I went off to fetch Mel who was quite excited to see her knight in blonde armor.
I went to sit with J-socks and the guys and Irish was on me like salt on fries. Apparently, he had his sights on me the whole time and was quite delighted when I went to sit next to him. He is only in town visiting for awhile, but between the green eyes, adorable Irish brogue, and fabulously muscle-y arms, I was not putting up any kind of fight. In fact, after that the rest of the night is pretty much a blur. But the best/worst part? The ridiculous pictures that surfaced the next day. At one point, I looked around and all 3 of us were making out with our respective guys at the bar. Classy broads!
I shouldn't share these pics with you, because they are a) incriminating and b) embarrassing. But they are also c) hilarious, and that always wins out for me. Now, most of these pictures were staged for photos, but still. They are RIDIC!! At least each one serves to teach a lesson.
1) The Pre-Kiss Linger
I'm back on the block and ready to rock, y'all!
As much fun as I had putting the ASS back in ASSpen with my fam, I will admit I'm having a bit of a difficult time accepting my new role as "Family 5th wheel." In a way, it's totally justice for my sister, BH, for all the years she had to deal with it. It's really not a day at the disco.
I mean, no one really "leaves me out" per se, but still. My parents want to do one thing, BH and her bf want to do another, I don't want to do either and--boom. There I am, alone. Now, as you know I am pretty fiercely independent, but still. When you're away on vacay in a beautiful spot, those are the times that make you truly reflect on how you wish you had someone to share it with. Or at least share your ridiculously huge, plush, would-never-fit-in-NYC King sized bed. Sheesh!
So, I hopped on a super early flight and got myself back to "civilization" fast. I love my family and we have a blast together, but sometimes I just need to get back to my own life to feel better. Weird.
I then agreed to meet out J-Socks and Mel, who you may remember from "Crazy Brit Guy Piggy Back Ride" night out. These are my two newly single, formerly married friends who are basically in the place I was about a year ago when I was single for the first time in a decade. I can practically hear them screaming "FREEEDOM AT LAAAAST!" with every drink we have. It's awesome.
Although re-uniting the two of them (we all used to work together) was like reuniting gasoline and dynamite. They can often make ME look tame. Yes, that's hard to do. But, impressive nonetheless.
So we had another of our "Wild Wednesdays."
At the onset, this one gave the facade of being a more tame one than the previous nights of boy-filled debauchery.
I met up with Mel at Kingswood which was fairly chill. Mel had been told that it was filled with "hot, aussie men" and was gravely disappointed when that appeared to be a strong false. Alas, I assured her it was just early-- Yes, remarkably 8:30p in NYC on a Wednesday is early. Sure enough, by the time J-Socks rolled in about 40 mins later, so did more boys. However, due to my position at the bar, we had been engaging in conversation with a tall, blonde cutie who was waiting for his friends. The best part about hanging out with J & M is that we all have VERY different types:
Mine: Tall, dark and often hipster.
Mel: Blondies, preferably tall
J-Socks: Swarthy, ranging from Latino to Eurotrash.
Since I happened to be sitting next to a Mel-type, J and I did a whole bar switcharoo while she was in the bathroom so she'd have to come back and sit next to Blondie, which worked quite well. I have no idea if the boys even noticed, not that they seemed to mind. Blondie had friends with him and they kept us continuously in cocktails.
I had also had the genius idea that night that, in effort to drink less calorically, I should only drink vodka sodas. That's fine if you're only going to have a 3-4 drink night. I'm pretty sure I was at drink 5 before we even left Kingswood. Brilliant plan, Lindsey!
Unfortunately, Blondie was the only looker of his crew and we were all cocktail'd up and ready to start our night. So, we bid them adieu to hit our good ol' standby, the Standard Biergarten, or as I have recently re-named it, MeatGarten.
It might be the ultimate pick-up scene and we have, historically, done very well there. Characters such as Muscle Brit and Jewish Lawyer (I may not have blogged about him due to dullness) have been spawned from said location. But this night at the Standard was a little off. First, J-socks got into an argument with a dorky dad about how it's totally fine to put her daughter into pageants if her daughter wants to do it. While amusing, not really beneficial to my dating life. So we wandered to another side of the expansive bar where I began talking to a very VERY tall and good-looking guy who happens to be a Canadian import. I have no idea how long we spoke since my number of cocktails had obviously been gradually increasing, but I do know he kept hugging me, got my number and then turned and kind of blew me off? Weird, but whatever. We had already decided to make a move to another favorite location, gastropub Wilfie & Nell's in the West Village.
Jackpot.
I don't know why I was dragging behind, but all I recall is walking in to J & M already seated at a table with two pretty hot guys, one who happened to be Irish.
Since it seemed like they were all set up, I went to the bar [home of my credit card that I seem to have left there and still haven't been back to retrieve] to get a drink. That's when I noticed Blondie at the bar! I think we had been texting them our locations, but he seemed to act like it was a random run-in. Regardless, I went off to fetch Mel who was quite excited to see her knight in blonde armor.
I went to sit with J-socks and the guys and Irish was on me like salt on fries. Apparently, he had his sights on me the whole time and was quite delighted when I went to sit next to him. He is only in town visiting for awhile, but between the green eyes, adorable Irish brogue, and fabulously muscle-y arms, I was not putting up any kind of fight. In fact, after that the rest of the night is pretty much a blur. But the best/worst part? The ridiculous pictures that surfaced the next day. At one point, I looked around and all 3 of us were making out with our respective guys at the bar. Classy broads!
I shouldn't share these pics with you, because they are a) incriminating and b) embarrassing. But they are also c) hilarious, and that always wins out for me. Now, most of these pictures were staged for photos, but still. They are RIDIC!! At least each one serves to teach a lesson.
1) The Pre-Kiss Linger
 |
| A lesson in setting the stage for a great first kiss 2) The Fake Nursing Pic {feat J-Socks} |
 |
| A lesson in remembering that all men are babies |
3) The Hookah Smoking Pic (that you don't remember taking) |
 |
| A lesson in not taking pics with phallic objects near your mouth |
4) The Highlighting your ASSets pic |
 |
| A lesson in never doing this again. EVER. |
For some reason unbeknownst to me, Irish also sent me this pic of him. I honestly have no idea why, but THANK YOU, ABS!
Very needless to say, based on photo evidence above, we had a wild n' crazy night that ended up with EVERYONE sleeping at my tiny apt. Or at least they started out there. Seriously....
Who.Am. I?
Oh well, it was fun!
Moving on to #59!
The next day I received a text:
"Hey 5'9, meet any other hot 6'5 Canadians last night?"
I replied:
"Only 3. Slow night."
We engaged in a text-change that ended up with him asking me to meet him for a drink on the LES later that night. Since I was already going to be there for a friend's party, I figured why the hell not!
So after party #1 ended, I set off to meet Tall Canadian for a drink. And, that's precisely what his name was in my phone. Wanna know why?
I had NO idea what his name was!
And really, how could I have possibly been expected to remember that information?
I met Tall Canadian at a nearby lounge and led off with:
"Wanna hear a funny story? I have no idea what your name is!"
He thought that was hilarious, alright, and continued to think so when he refused to tell me his name. I countered that he wouldn't know mine at all if it hadn't been programmed into his phone.
He agreed this was probably true, but instead bartered to only give me his name if I bought the next round. Now, I usually offer to buy a round anyway, and since this was part of a game we were playing, I played along, but something felt odd. The bartender heard it all and basically told me I should RUN out of the bar at that minute and not look back!
Okay, it wasn't that extreme, lady. But still, I don't like being asked to do anything. However, he is Canadian so...who knows. Plus, Mr. 6'5 turned out to be 25. Yikes. I haven't gone there in awhile. I decided it wasn't a date night deal-breaker, just something to be acutely aware of.
We had a good time together though, good chemistry, good conversation. He's quite affectionate, holding my hand almost from the get-go. That's a new one.
Several bars and bites later we were both exhausted and I told him he could walk me home. Halfway there,he stopped me in the street and planted one one me. I like this kind of spontaneity. I also like when it isn't all saved up for that "goodbye kiss moment." Yeech. Too much pressure!
As he walked me to my door he pulled the old "Can I use your bathroom?" trick.
ACK!
What do you do in this situation???
This has happened a few times and I can't exactly tell someone to hold it as they walk home 20 blocks at 1:30am, can I? It's such an annoying position to be put in. But, I was determined no slumber parties would be happening.
Apparently he thought differently, unless in Canada using someone's bathroom goes hand in hand with taking your boots off?
We had a nice, strong make-out in my kitchen but when he tried to move me over to my couch, I gave him the smack-down. I'm pretty sure I said "Boots on, ass out the door!" I said it in a nice way, though!
Clearly he wasn't too pissed off at me for that since I've heard from him today, but still. What is with these dum dums?
I've had enough for the week. And it was a SHORT WEEK!
I'm off to collect my credit card. And possibly, my dignity.
Happy Friday, y'all!
xo
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
Dating story #57, Oops...I did it again.
Happy post-fourth, y'all!
Isn't re-entry a bee-otch?
I had a lovely time in Aspen with my fam.
 |
| The Maroon Bells with Dad and sis |
Aspen truly is God's country. God's really, really, ridiculously rich country.
wow.
Here's us biking downhill from the above vista. Yes, I am taking pics while biking. My family didn't seem to think this was so safe. Odd, right?
 |
| Look, Dad! One hand...on my iPhone! |
 |
| me n' awesome reader Lolli |
She lives in Aspen and we ended up meeting for a drink and the ever-interesting Sky Hotel.
On To The Dating Story!
I have no idea if you'll recall waaay back in March when I had a crazy night out, got a little too sauced, and hooked up with a Co-worker? Well, that happened.
And it wasn't totally a random thing either. We genuinely like each other and had recently broken into a fit of what I like to call "The Church Giggles" during a meeting. You know, the times when you're not supposed to laugh but you cannot STOP laughing and it just keeps getting worse? Yeah, one of those. And it's not easy for someone to do that to me either. I've always liked this guy and the thought had crossed my mind a time or two, but it took his initiating things to really make me take notice.
And, like I said in the previous post, it was a surprisingly awesome time.
One I thought might happen again, based on fun-factor and him saying "We should hang out again." [Or something to that effect]
Things were mostly normal(ish) at work with us, and I even made extra efforts to go by his office occasionally and laugh it up with co-worker and his office mate. But, other than that, we really didn't have many exchanges, save the random printer or elevator run-ins. I can't say I was bummed or upset or anything, but I was somewhat surprised and just always felt like something was up. BFWB absolutely loves this guy (he is like the mayor of our office and also has some serious bromances with dudes he thinks are cool), so he was SUPER excited when I told him the SECRET news of our drunken dalliance.
From time to time, I'd ask BFWB why he thought co-worker was being so aloof. His theory was that he takes work very seriously and is also hard at work on a screenplay.
Fair enough. I didn't give it much thought after that.
Until last week...
Co-worker accepted a job at another agency and last tuesday night was his going away party. I was already double-booked with the Vanessa Carlton thing {see last post} plus another dear friend's moving away party. Sheesh! What's up with Tuesday night, people? But, I really wanted to swing by co-worker's party. In fact, I felt somewhat compelled to for some reason.
So, I left event #2, about 2 blocks from my apt and went all the way to the West Village to the bar they were at. There were only about 6 people left standing at this point and co-worker seemed REALLY happy to see me. He gave me a huge hug and told me I looked like a "Diva," which apparently is a good (?) thing amongst his group of friends?
It didn't take very long for us to be the last two standing and, by that point, I could tell he didn't want me to go. We instantly got into talking about what went down between us. I don't know if it was the alcohol (and I'm sure he'd had a LOT, although he seemed totally in control), or the sense of freedom from fleeing our dungeon---er--office, but he talked so freely it was GREAT!
So, wanna know why co-worker steered clear of me?
[Of course you do.]
Turns out, about 2 weeks after our little rendezvous, co-worker was at ANOTHER co-worker's going away party. (Yes, we have a lot of them lately.)
BFWB was also at said party. And, BOMBED.
Apparently, BFWB went right up to co-worker, shook his hand and said "Congrats, man. You won."
Co-worker, totally confused, said something to the effect of "I don't know what you're talking about?"
To which BFW[drunk-ass]B raised an eyebrow and coyly said "Oh, I think you DO."
um....
HELLOOOOOOOO!
First off, BFWB and I look like a physical match. And, we spend an ass-load of time together and are very affectionate, as best friends. But still, most people at work are convinced we're schtupping on the regular.
So clearly, a statement like that sent poor co-worker for a loop and made him think he was infringing on BFWB's territory.
Awesomeness.
Even awesomER?
BFWB has ZERO recollection of ever doing this!
And, to his credit, feels horrible about it.
HA!
He owes me. BIG time.
Meanwhile, co-worker and I, with all that behind us, had an awesome time getting burgers and beer late-night, making out at the bar, and enjoying our last night as co-workers. And...maybe as slumber partiers. Again.
Oops.
I will say, it was incredibly awesome to actually find out the reason that a guy doesn't follow through for a change! How often does that actually happen?
Then again, how often does your best guy friend accidentally throw down the World's Greatest Cock Block?
Precisely.
We'll see if co-worker keeps in touch at his new digs. I'm hopeful but not holding my breath. If anything, I'd really love to be friends with this guy. He could possibly be one of the nicest I've ever come across.
Now I'm going to end this post so I can continue reading The Hunger Games.
Oh, what's that?
IF YOU DON'T KNOW, GET EDUCATED NOW!!!
I have an unhealthy obsession with it and, therefore, you should too. No joke, one of the most enthralling book series I've ever come across. In fact, I guarantee that, unless you are illiterate (in which case, you would not be reading this blog), you will like it.
And, do it like I did it.
Don't research.
Don't read about it.
Just READ IT.
NOW.
{y'welcome.}
Thanks for the vino, lovely Lolli! So glad you reached out.
Sidebar: If I lived in Colorado, I'd be the cheapest date EVER. That altitude drop-kicked my ass so hard. Just two glasses of wine and I felt bombed. Wowza.
On To The Dating Story!
I have no idea if you'll recall waaay back in March when I had a crazy night out, got a little too sauced, and hooked up with a Co-worker? Well, that happened.
And it wasn't totally a random thing either. We genuinely like each other and had recently broken into a fit of what I like to call "The Church Giggles" during a meeting. You know, the times when you're not supposed to laugh but you cannot STOP laughing and it just keeps getting worse? Yeah, one of those. And it's not easy for someone to do that to me either. I've always liked this guy and the thought had crossed my mind a time or two, but it took his initiating things to really make me take notice.
And, like I said in the previous post, it was a surprisingly awesome time.
One I thought might happen again, based on fun-factor and him saying "We should hang out again." [Or something to that effect]
Things were mostly normal(ish) at work with us, and I even made extra efforts to go by his office occasionally and laugh it up with co-worker and his office mate. But, other than that, we really didn't have many exchanges, save the random printer or elevator run-ins. I can't say I was bummed or upset or anything, but I was somewhat surprised and just always felt like something was up. BFWB absolutely loves this guy (he is like the mayor of our office and also has some serious bromances with dudes he thinks are cool), so he was SUPER excited when I told him the SECRET news of our drunken dalliance.
From time to time, I'd ask BFWB why he thought co-worker was being so aloof. His theory was that he takes work very seriously and is also hard at work on a screenplay.
Fair enough. I didn't give it much thought after that.
Until last week...
Co-worker accepted a job at another agency and last tuesday night was his going away party. I was already double-booked with the Vanessa Carlton thing {see last post} plus another dear friend's moving away party. Sheesh! What's up with Tuesday night, people? But, I really wanted to swing by co-worker's party. In fact, I felt somewhat compelled to for some reason.
So, I left event #2, about 2 blocks from my apt and went all the way to the West Village to the bar they were at. There were only about 6 people left standing at this point and co-worker seemed REALLY happy to see me. He gave me a huge hug and told me I looked like a "Diva," which apparently is a good (?) thing amongst his group of friends?
It didn't take very long for us to be the last two standing and, by that point, I could tell he didn't want me to go. We instantly got into talking about what went down between us. I don't know if it was the alcohol (and I'm sure he'd had a LOT, although he seemed totally in control), or the sense of freedom from fleeing our dungeon---er--office, but he talked so freely it was GREAT!
So, wanna know why co-worker steered clear of me?
[Of course you do.]
Turns out, about 2 weeks after our little rendezvous, co-worker was at ANOTHER co-worker's going away party. (Yes, we have a lot of them lately.)
BFWB was also at said party. And, BOMBED.
Apparently, BFWB went right up to co-worker, shook his hand and said "Congrats, man. You won."
Co-worker, totally confused, said something to the effect of "I don't know what you're talking about?"
To which BFW[drunk-ass]B raised an eyebrow and coyly said "Oh, I think you DO."
um....
HELLOOOOOOOO!
First off, BFWB and I look like a physical match. And, we spend an ass-load of time together and are very affectionate, as best friends. But still, most people at work are convinced we're schtupping on the regular.
So clearly, a statement like that sent poor co-worker for a loop and made him think he was infringing on BFWB's territory.
Awesomeness.
Even awesomER?
BFWB has ZERO recollection of ever doing this!
And, to his credit, feels horrible about it.
HA!
He owes me. BIG time.
Meanwhile, co-worker and I, with all that behind us, had an awesome time getting burgers and beer late-night, making out at the bar, and enjoying our last night as co-workers. And...maybe as slumber partiers. Again.
Oops.
I will say, it was incredibly awesome to actually find out the reason that a guy doesn't follow through for a change! How often does that actually happen?
Then again, how often does your best guy friend accidentally throw down the World's Greatest Cock Block?
Precisely.
We'll see if co-worker keeps in touch at his new digs. I'm hopeful but not holding my breath. If anything, I'd really love to be friends with this guy. He could possibly be one of the nicest I've ever come across.
Now I'm going to end this post so I can continue reading The Hunger Games.
IF YOU DON'T KNOW, GET EDUCATED NOW!!!
I have an unhealthy obsession with it and, therefore, you should too. No joke, one of the most enthralling book series I've ever come across. In fact, I guarantee that, unless you are illiterate (in which case, you would not be reading this blog), you will like it.
And, do it like I did it.
Don't research.
Don't read about it.
Just READ IT.
NOW.
{y'welcome.}
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